My roommate is watching a Chinese movie with more child abuse/rape than anything I have ever seen. No really.

Another thing: can we have a little picture come up in the bookmarks section? Right now, it's a boring blank page. Google has the big blue G, Overheard in NY has the ear, and Facebook has a little man; I want something too. I want the world. I want the WHOLE WORLD (Veruca Salt = Adolf Hitler?).

On an unrelated note...

I'm really hating the current trend in D-list celebrities for using states of being as continous verbs.

viz: "I'm really loving Big Brother at the moment".

Also, it's infiltrating other levels of society because my brother just told me he's really liking Black Books at the moment. Repent, Limeys¹. The invasion is imminent.

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1. This link is here not because I don't think you know, but because I found it so obnoxious.

The Long Distance Valentine, or "What could possibly say I love you better than a bear clutching a little red heart", or the shameless parody.

I'm sorry, Sufjan. I really am.

Valentine's day is fast approaching, and being in a long-distance relationship I am in a bit of a quandry as to what I should do to celebrate. I've split the different options (and how they would portray me) into a list. I'm currently in 2a), tending towards 1).

1. The realist sends a small-ish card, by second class post. It may have a note inside it saying how they'd love to spend the day together, but can't. In addition, they'll have a long phonecall and tell eachother they love eachother more often than usual.

2. The post-modern ironic smartass is the guy that refuses to send anything because Valentine's Day is commercialist bullshit. Not only this - he insists on telling everyone he meets for a fortnight beforehand that Valentine's presents is commercial bullshit. He may also use words like "hyper-consumerism", "corporate conspiracy" and "the MAN" .
2a). The secure relationship refuses to send anything because there are more ways of saying 'I love you' and there's no need to prove it with tacky tat just for one day of the year.

3. The no-hoper sends an e-card, possibly even an animated one, with the text to the effect of "I luv u!!" either because he forgot to buy one or he genuinely thinks e-cards are a good thing.
The no-hoper is usually single by Feb. 15th unless the act is construed as being so ridiculous that he is in fact mistaken for 2), in which case he gets bonus points for being witty, funny or soooo ironic.

4. The Sentimentalist sends a careful, thoughtful card with perhaps a poem inside that has been composed for the occasion. Phrases like "Roses are red, violets are blue" are avoided at all costs. They may also have flowers delivered, and spend hours on the day looking at photos of the couple together. They will then cry themself to sleep. People like this suck.

5. Anyone who sends a stuffed toy - be it elephant, monkey holding humerous banana or indeed teddy bear with a little red heart - will be first against the wall when the revolution comes.

Holla at da physicists

http://www.scienceblog.com/cms/physicists-find-way-to-see-extra-dimensions-12520.html
Also, how do I make fancy little blue links? I was only visited by the Ghost of Internet Past.

Sima's Folly?

Would anyone like to meet me in Alaska this summer?
http://www.alaska.com/places/parks/kefj/story/4481433p-4460422c.html

I'm pretty bent on going on some kind of a trip. Yes, I realize that no one has any money. But we will be camping - our only expense is getting there. Think of the sea otters, whales, and extremely hungry black bears.

In other news, the Superbowl, America's largest spectacle short of the presidential election, went down today in Miami. While I lived on Regent Street, my only access to football was staying up until 6 am on Sunday nights (for some reason, they aired Sunday night football but not Monday night football; in the US, Monday is the big night), watching disinterested British commentators talk about cricket. My other option was bribing pubs to put the games on (too expensive). Therefore, this year was a glorious return to obsession. The best part about the National Football League is that if you saw ANY player (ok, not kickers) walking down the street, you would immediately think, "This is not a human being - it is a terrifying war machine." With the exception of Sumo Wrestlers (obesity is scary in a different way) and basketball players (when's the last time you saw five 7-foot tall people together at the same time), football players are the most nightmarish men on Earth. And the terrorists.

Harry Potter

This is disturbing. On so many levels. But you know what I find disturbing the most? That you can go and watch Daniel Radcliffe (which, due to my time in Oxford, I was able to spell perfectly, which pleases me to no end) naked and simulating sex scenes, but you can't have pictures of him (technically, that'd be underage photography, so you'd be liable to arrested). What logic is that? You can have sex, but not be photographed? Too many thoughts are clogging up my mind thinking about it.

And, to my surprising pleasure, the final book will be coming out July 21st. That means, when I'm in the UK at the end of July, I can pick up a copy and complete my collection of British versions of Harry Potter. Lucky me!

Actually, the real reason to write this post is so that I could link to this. I still love it.

In the immortal words of Sisqo

Here's another tidbit from the life of a paper boy who, in a few months time, will begin work on yield projections for wind power at domestic scales, thank you.

Britain seems to be almost unique in having newspapers that are sorted by audience to the extent that even someone like me who almost never buys one can still describe their socio-political-economic status by the newspaper they would, theoretically, buy. Personally I'm an Independant reader, though most of my friends are Guardian types. My parents get the local paper.

Obviously, different markets implies a different focus. The Telegraph loves it whenever Gordon Brown wakes up suddenly and someone gets a photo of him looking kind of dopy- I mean, that's front-page material. Similarly, the Mail makes it a point of pride to give you all the facts and figures about exactly how many foreigners are creepin' round your back stair.

Nonetheless, some days the news is so important, so grandiose that it shows up on the sweep of human history. On those days, all you can do is apply the house style and know that you've taken part in the grand story.

Times: Yeah, we can't really ignore this anymore.
Guardian: Climate change worse than we thought.
Independant: Humanity royallyboned.
Express: Taxes suck, especially ones aimed at rich white people.